The last of the treatment...Yay!

This poem was inspired by my last session of chemo at the hospital.
I ask why most people expected me to be all skinny and very ill looking.
The staff told me that at one time, patients were only given chemo, they would be very sick and loose their appetite. Now anti-sickness and appetite enhancers are given as a matter of course, so, unless you loose your hair, no one can really tell.

Where am I now?

6th and final chemo cycle,

This will take all day,

Like all the other chemo,

Later on, I'll pay.

The patients here

All look so well.

We all have cancer,

But you can't tell.

Along with chemo in your veins

Some other stuff goes in.

This all stops you from being sick,

And stops you from being slim!

The drugs give you an appetite,

So....you eat a lot,

And you 'bang' the weight on!

Your diets are forgot!

The Doctors and the Nurses

Say you must loose NO weight!

So, if you do, they say to you,

"Go home, and fill your plate!"

So now I have neuropathay,

Phlebitis and feel numb,

And all I have to show for it

I a whacking great big bum!

The next thing that I need to do,

Is go and have a scan.

This will be the 'benchmark',

And shows cancer, if it can.

So for now, I will tell myself

That after all this 'hell',

Carol Hubbard is now 'cancer free!'

And 'feeling, Oh, so well!'

Now I have to go to work,

And pick up where I left,

And hope that I can still do it,

Despite some side effects.

I know I can,

I'm sure I can,

I'm made of some tough stuff.

That, and some support from work

I know will be enough!

Carol Hubbard 31st May 2011

My personal Journey so far

This poem was inspired by my diagnosis of cancer.
I have Neuroendocrine small cell cancer of the vagina.
Please feel free to read my blog if you have an interest in this subject.
confessionsofacancerpatient.blogspot.com.
If not, just enjoy the following verses.

My Personal Journey so far

I found a lump,

Small and sore.

Nothing for worries.

I've had them before.

To sit, stand and lay,

The thing hurt so much.

So, off to the Doctors 

For 'pain killing' stuff.

The Doctor, he looked,

He poked and he prodded.

"Go to the hospital!"

He looked a bit worried.

"The lump must be removed".

We think it's a cyst.

Biopsy approved.

Make sure nothing is missed."

A little time later,

A phone call I get.

"Come in on Friday,

To see me, my pet".

Friday is here.

To the hospital I trot.

"Sorry, my love,

"It's cancer you've got".

I must  have some Chemo,

Radiotherapy too.

28 days.

"This will effect you".

"You must have it done

To extend your life.

Stay being a Mother,

A sister, a wife."

"If I go through all of this,

How long will I live?

Give me a clue,

How long do you give?"

"There's no way to tell

If the cancer will die,

Or if it is you,

 Summoned on high".

My family and medics say,

"Give it a try!

Give it a chance

So that you wont die!"

3 x 3 cycles of chemo is done.

28 days of radiotherapy,

So close to my bum!

I am so tired, so burnt and so sore! 

Please don't make me have any more!!!!!

I can't sleep, I can't walk,

I can't wee, for the pain!

I can't stand, I can't sit!

Oh - NEVER AGAIN!!

Chemo is fine,

Just makes you feel sick,

And dizzy and tired

And poorly, so quick.

Radiotherapy is hard, it's rot!

28 days, I took all on the trot!

Would I have it again?

Certainly NOT!

The pain at times

Caused so much grief!

I actually saw death 

As a welcome relief!

Now that it's over, 

I don't remember the pain,

But, I do know for sure

Not to have it again!

Another  3 x 3 cycles 

Of chemo to go.

How do I feel?

Well, I don't really know.

Chemo is better

Than your bum being burned.

But other STUFF comes with it,

This recently, I learned.

2 and a half cycles

Again, I've been through.

So, just wait and see,

That's all I can do!

Carol Hubbard 1st June 2011.